


Answer my prayer (Even though I never prayed it)

by ParadoxinMotion



Series: Essential as Earth [2]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: All the pain goes here is what I'm sayin', Angst, Domestic, Fluff, M/M, One-shot verse hell yeah, Romance, hurt-comfort
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-05
Updated: 2016-03-01
Packaged: 2018-05-18 07:27:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5905714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ParadoxinMotion/pseuds/ParadoxinMotion
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“You’re the prettiest boy I’ve ever met,” Eren breathed, watching him, observing the expression he made when his mouth opened in wonder, and confusion. Armin looked like he was choking on words he could not shape, but it didn’t matter. Eren kissed him again to show him that it didn’t matter, that anything Armin needed to say could always be communicated with actions if he could not find the words.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One Hour

**Author's Note:**

> Hopefully, you were brought here by my link in chapter 6 of AEITS. Or maybe you just showed up for some Eremin fluff. Either way, here you go!

 

Eren didn’t have any trouble admitting that he was tired. In all truth, he was exhausted. The club had only been open since five, and yet it felt like he’d been working for the whole day. Weariness pulled at the lines on his forehead and made ugly crinkles into the creases of his eyes. Even Petra was beginning to look sympathetic as she caught his eye in passing.

One hour. One hour, and he could go home. One hour and he could go back to his shitty little apartment and wonder for the dozenth time if he’d done something wrong.

If he’d done something to make Armin want to stay away.

The rational part of his mind knew that there were only so many things he could have done. After all, it wasn’t as if they were engaged in regular conversation.

Had he been too forward? Maybe asking Armin to dance had been too big of a step…but he’d been so _eager,_ and so _infatuated_ with the boy who had watched him with such fascination. Nobody had looked at him like that, and it sparked something a bit prideful, and made him wonder what he had to do to make him to do it again. And again.

And perhaps again after that.

And so when he had come out of the bathroom, hands still damp from being washed, and his eyes had found him again, well. There was only so much he could do.

Armin looked beautiful. Eren had never tried denying that fact to himself; he’d noticed it when they’d met and he noticed it now. A white button-up shirt made his blue eyes seem to glow, and Eren watched the curve of his slender fingers as they dropped to his waist, resting against unassuming tan pants.

Eren’s face split into a grin so wide it could probably be seen from the streets below. Armin still had not noticed him, but Eren saw Petra turn, tray of glasses balanced on one hand, and shoot him a glance. His grin faded into an innocent smile, tapping his watch to signify that he was taking his break. Fifteen minutes. Would it be enough? Probably not. Was he going to take the chance?

Oh, Lord, yes.

He pushed through the crowd, past a gaggle of laughing women and a couple offering each other sips of their bourbon. His eyes remained fixed on a single object, and they stayed that way until he tapped Armin’s shoulder, taking a step back as he grinned again.

Lord, the boy spun around faster than a Spanish woman doing a tango. Eren’s heart might have been doing one of its own in his chest as Armin’s eyes widened in shock, then relief, then nervousness. Eren wanted to wipe it wipe it away and replace it with a smile.

Without saying a word, he gestured for Armin to follow him, desperate to hold his hand but at least possessing the wits to know that that wasn’t an option. Fortunately, Armin hurried behind him, equally silent. Eren would have given a great deal to see the expression on his face.

He reached the back, opening the door for the both of them, and waiting until Armin was outside before he spoke again.

“What’s the big idea?” Hands on his hips, Eren glared at him.

Armin looked surprised, then confused. The cocktail of emotions on his face was better than any Eren had ever mixed on the bar counter. “What do you mean?”

“You show up, a fella teaches you some dance moves, and then, what? You skip town for two weeks? Not a single peep from you.” Eren poked his chest.

Armin’s mouth worked, and Eren felt almost sorry for what he’d said by the distress evident there.

“Sorry,” the shorter boy finally managed. “I, um.”

“What?” Eren’s fingers felt like they had a mind of their own; itching to reach up and trace invisible constellations on his neck.

Armin flushed, looking almost as if he wanted to run back inside. His voice was a mumble when he finally answered. “I was afraid.”

“Afraid?” Eren couldn’t pretend like he didn’t understand, but he could at least make Armin explain.

The blonde nodded, staring at the ground. “You can’t act like you don’t know that _friends_ don’t do this, Eren.”

“We’re friends?”

Armin blinked at him, and Eren felt a small bit of satisfaction knowing that he’d surprised him. “I think so.”

Eren’s body was thrumming with energy.

“And I can’t…I don’t know…” Armin looked lost, and something underneath Eren’s ribs pulled uncomfortably.

Pulled, and seemingly snapped, as Eren almost staggered forward, hands reaching for him. Armin was back up against the wall with a slight yelp, blue eyes wide in the almost non-existent light.

Eren held himself back for one hundredth of a second, the duration of which he spent weighing his options, and then abruptly throwing them to the wind.

Armin’s lips were warm, and soft. A little chapped. They were stiff under Eren’s in surprise, slender hands reaching up and _oh God is he pushing me away_ grasping Eren’s sleeves. He was slow to reciprocate, but when he did it was like wildfire licking down Eren’s consciousness.

“You’re so afraid of sticking out,” Eren breathed, voice numb over the roar of his own ears. . “You’re terrified of someone seeing you, the you underneath.” He pressed a soft, desperate kiss to the curve of his throat and he could see, see Armin’s lovely mouth stifle a moan. “Why do you not understand how beautiful it is?”

“I’m-“ Armin’s voice was hesitant; unsure. His breath hitched on the air. “I _can’t,_ Eren. This world you have in your head, this pretty, gossamer world, it isn’t _real._ It doesn’t exist because it _can’t._ ” He shook his head, and the hopelessness in his eyes made something in Eren’s chest twist.

“Then let me.” Now Eren was the one feeling nervous; afraid of pushing his boundaries too far. “Let me see you. _You,_ ” he repeated, hoping that Armin understood.

Armin, _cleverbeautifulsmart_ Armin, understood. His fingers tightened on the sleeves of Eren’s shirt, blue eyes wide, but no longer as frightened. There was something else, something richer and fiercer that shown _brighter._ But his voice was still soft, still retaining its shyness.

“I don’t know how.”

“Start with _trusting me._ ” Eren found his own tone dropping, as if his mind was nodding in approval at the earnestness of quiet. His own hands reached up to rest on Armin’s shoulders, the height advantage giving him something to lean on. Green eyes blazed even in the bare light, not an ounce of deceit in them.

Armin took in a deep breath, and for the shred of a second Eren thought that he might refuse. Abruptly, however, he deflated, practically sagging against Eren’s hold in the cover of darkness.

“I want to.” His voice steeled with sincerity as his roving eyes found bright ones once more. Eren sensed a _but_ in the words, however, and spoke before Armin could continue.

“I _know_ it’s dangerous. I know that you’re scared, and for perfectly good reasons.”

Armin was so close. His breath was so warm where it brushed over Eren’s tanned cheek, and he smelled like motor oil. Somehow, that didn’t bother Eren at all. His body was screaming at him to _touch,_ to _reach forward_ and just let himself _taste._ But the rational part of his mind, the small whisper buried among the wreckage of his excitement, managed to find its way to his mouth as he finished.

“But I also know that we have a chance, Armin. I know that I hate watching you walk out the door, and I hate how scared you are. And,” his voice slowed, quieting with finality. “I know that I want to know more about you.”

Armin drew in a hitched breath, and his shoulders seemed to straighten almost subconsciously as he looked at Eren. Eren simply stood still, waiting with a swiftly decreasing reservoir of patience, for him to respond.

“I want that, too.”

Just a few words. But at that small declaration, Eren felt his heart leaping into his chest. Like a drowning man being dragged to the surface, or a broke man discovering he had inherited a fortune.

“So now that we have that decided,” he found himself saying, almost unaware of the words. “Can I _please_ kiss you again?”

Armin laughed breathily, hands releasing Eren’s sleeves in favour of moving to his shoulders.

“You _may,_ ” he corrected gently, and Eren’s eyes were already rolling when he leaned forward, pressing their lips together with fading uncertainty.

-=-=-=-=-


	2. Blurred Poetry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _I am terribly afraid, that I am terribly in love with you. ___

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Eruri oneshot that goes with chapter 12.

 

Somewhere across the city, in a tiny, spotlessly clean apartment, things were not so different. Erwin had finally left work, later than Levi would have liked, but earlier than he had expected.

The knock came on his door a little past Eight, interrupting Levi mid-sip of black tea. He looked down at it regretfully for a moment, and then picked it up and headed for the front door.

“Oi.” Dark eyebrows rose when Erwin smiled at him sheepishly. He pulled the door open a little more widely to let the taller man step through, then closed and locked it behind them. Erwin bent to kiss his cheek, but refrained from pulling him into the hug he so desperately wanted, for the sake of Levi’s beloved black tea.

If Levi were asked, “Do you like Erwin more than your black tea?” Erwin still fears faintly for the answer.

Levi wandered into the tiny kitchen area, setting his cup down with a soft _plink!_ He held up the kettle to Erwin, face inquiring. “Tea?”

Erwin smiled, blue eyes softening as he went to get his own mug from the cabinet where Levi stored them. There were still the two untouched ones pushed in the back, and he frowned slightly.

“Levi?”

“Mm?” The small man wasn’t looking at him, and Erwin knew that was nothing if not strategic.

“I know you don’t want to hear this, but I really think you should start using them again,” Erwin’s voice slipped out in the wake of a soft sigh, letting Levi pour him some of the fragrant black liquid.

Levi shrugged, stubbornness etched into his angular face. “I don’t want to get rid of them,” he muttered, tea still sitting on the counter, cooling.

Erwin took both of his hands, forcing Levi to turn slightly. His face was grave, but he knew that Levi would understand, even if he didn’t appreciate. “I know you don’t,” he said, voice soft. It wrapped around Levi like a blanket; sometimes he hated how very _comforting_ just a few words from a certain mouth could be. “And you don’t need to get rid of them. But you can’t let them just sit there, useless, reminding you every time you reach for a glass.”

Levi’s eyes darted down, lip caught between his teeth. He didn’t try to bring Erwin any closer, but he didn’t pull away or push him off, either.

“Maybe I’ll…move them,” he conceded, looking up, meeting Erwin’s eyes with his own for the first time. They were dark and sharp, roving around as if always searching for something. But when he was with Erwin, they seemed to slow. Levi’s eyes stopped along with the rest of them, content to let the search rest for awhile.

Erwin leaned down to give him a proper kiss, then added another to the corner of Levi’s soft mouth because he couldn’t help him. Levi waved him off with a grumble, but Erwin noted with satisfaction the tiny smile he was barely concealing.

They took their drinks to the equally small living room, setting the tea down on the scratched coffee table. Every time he visited, Erwin wished a little more that he could do everything for Levi that he _wanted-_ a bigger apartment, nicer furniture, a bed that didn’t creak when they-

Well. Erwin cleared his throat and sipped his tea. Time for that later.

Besides, it wasn’t just the enormous difficulty of doing anything like this for another man, which was enough in itself. Levi was also very proud, and would never accept if Erwin offered to make his accommodations more comfortable. He liked to live simple, and while Erwin understood…

He looked across the small table at Levi thumbing through something in his pocketbook, and smiled on another sigh.

As if on cue, Levi glanced up and handed a slip of paper to Erwin, putting his wallet off to the side. “I had a passenger today, that’s the receipt for it. I’ve actually taken him several times before, but I never knew he worked under you.”

Erwin’s eyebrows rose in surprise, looking back up at Levi. “This is Armin.”

“Yes, obviously.” Levi’s tones were dry as he finished his drink. “He said he’s a mechanic?”

“That’s right,” Erwin nodded as he handed the paper back over. “Why are you interested?”

Levi shrugged, pointer finger tracing the rim of his glass. “He’s a nice kid,” he said, finally. “And he always comes off from work like he really enjoyed it.” His thin shoulders rolled in a shrug, and he glanced up to meet Erwin’s gaze. Blue on blue, shades and shades between them. “That’s not something I see too often.”

Erwin smiled, not bothering to filter the pride in it. “Armin is one of my best; I have no trouble admitting that. If he seems to be enjoying his work, I’m only too glad to hear it.”

Levi looked at him for a moment, and a smile spread over his face for the first time. It still made Erwin’s chest glow warm and bright, like the first time, and the second time, and maybe every time after that.

“Other than Armin, how _has_ work been?”

Levi waved a hand, a faint air of disgust in the wave of his hand. “Same as always. You’d think that being one of the managers would mean that things get a little _less_ shitty, but apparently not.”

Erwin smiled slightly. They’d talked of this before, but somehow Levi never seemed very comfortable discussing his job. Erwin suspected it was because he was somehow ashamed of it, and wanted to do something better than being a cab driver. But what it was…?

_“I love aerodynamics,” Levi admitted, shifting against the warm covers._

_Erwin blinked, salt still drying on his skin from only minutes before. “Oh?”_

_Levi nodded, dark hair tickling his chest. “If I could do it over…if I could do it_ better… _”_

_“You’d study that,” Erwin finished, softly._

He was so deep in thought that he didn’t notice Levi speaking to him until the smaller man physically jostled his elbow, frowning. “Did you put something else in your tea?”

Erwin showed him his empty cup. “If I did, it’s too late to save me now.”

Levi snorted, the fondness in his eyes louder than any words he could have said. He finished his tea without fanfare, and then took both of their teacups and walked into the kitchen. Erwin paused a moment before following him, not even sure what he was doing.

Levi was washing their cups out in the sink, angular face set in concentration as the suds washed off his fingers and then reappeared as he scrubbed. There were a few beats of silence, the sound of running water the only thing to keep the apartment from being utterly still.

“You could,” Levi said, “stand there like a creep. _Or,”_ he turned and tossed a towel, which Erwin had to stumble forward to catch. The corners of Levi’s mouth tilted up before he turned quickly back around and finished. “You could help me dry.”

Erwin did as he was told, standing at Levi’s side to be there to dry as the smaller man finished. He had strategically chosen the side that the cabinet was on, and stretched up to put the cups away. The edge of his white collared shirt rode up slightly at the action, and when Erwin looked down again, Levi’s face was faintly red. He couldn’t resist the grin that took over his face; there was a small but bright _euphoria_ about being back here, back where he wanted to be.

In his own way, Levi seemed to be happy, too.

He pulled Erwin down with surprising strength for someone so small, lips meeting to close the distance halfway. Erwin considered for a split second and then picked him up with his strong hands, ignoring Levi’s affronted squawking until he was sitting on the counter. Levi opened his mouth to complain, but Erwin shut him up with another kiss, much more comfortable when Levi was nearly at eye-level like this.

His taxi driver sulked for a few seconds, determined not to reciprocate in some petty form of vengeance. Erwin pressed on determinedly, drawing him out with a playful nip at his lower lip, encouraging Levi to let him in.

He resisted a satisfied smirk when Levi finally caved, so stubborn in some areas, so beautifully giving in others. His slender arms went tightly around Erwin’s neck, pulling them closer together in some sort of tiny battle; each bringing out armada of lips and tongue and teeth.

Eventually, though, both ships burned to the water and Erwin hoisted him up, trusting Levi to hold on as he carried him towards their bedroom.

Their bedroom. He hadn’t thought of it that way before.

He deposited Levi on the bed, grinning again as the small man scowled up at him, obviously displeased at being manhandled. “Bastard.”

Erwin didn’t bother to quip back; he leaned down and lost himself in the warmth of Levi’s mouth again, indescribably and irrationally happy. His fingers reached at the edges of Levi’s shirt, not content until it was tossed to the floor in a crumple of lily white. Levi prodded at him until his slender fingers could unbutton the buttons on Erwin’s own shirt, drawing it off. He gave a soft sort of sigh as his eyes swept over Erwin’s chest, reaching out with almost tentative fingers to touch. Erwin was so distracted that he barely noticed for a second, but when he did, it was explosive. Levi’s fingers were the tiniest of fireworks; the coolest of sparks.

Their pants were the next to go, tugged off by impatient fingers mixing together, then slower tugs at underwear and hissed out breaths.

Erwin said something, he wasn’t even sure what, and Levi leaned back on the pillows. A tangle of pale skin and raven-dark hair, eyes shut in his laugh. He was so beautiful Erwin's heart ached at the mere sight of him; he wasn't sure if he should lean forward to kiss him or get on his knees to beg.

_You have me at your feet, Levi._

_Please don't kick me away._

But soon, his own impatience took over from his brain, and he was pressing Levi in the bed to kiss and lick and bite the smooth curve of his throat. He tasted like sweat and the aroma of black tea and the soap he used so vigorously in all his clothes. Erwin breathed in the faint scent of lavender and hummed.

Delicious.

Levi kissed him again, and he felt his grip on the objective begin to dissolve. Everything was slowing; going from prose to poetry faster than he had imagined.

Desire.

Everything went liquid, glimmering like a mirage in sweat-soaked skin. Erwin reached for the lube he knew Levi kept in his drawer, reaching back to squirt some in his palm. Levi spread his legs around him, beautiful face twisted in a moan when Erwin sunk a finger in, then another. He waited until Levi was squirming around him, practically begging with the pants of his breaths before adding another.

Then he was sinking in, _swimming_ in, and everything was pure, pooled want and Erwin’s hands were delicate like the brush of fins, gliding across Levi’s perfect hips.

_More, more, more._

In this room, in this bed, they were not human. They were not even animals, (although that argument could certainly be made). No, they were ethereal. They floated.

Hands on hips, fingers leaving bruises like kisses, heavy breath and pleasure-glazed eyes and always the whispered beg of _more, more, please give me more._ Every grip Levi had was shattering, losing itself in golden skin and clear blue eyes and the sheer sharpness of _love_ throbbing through his chest, terrifying him even as it gave him wings.

The first press inside was liquid; the first thrust was a riptide. Pulling Levi further out, further in, out to sea and away from a shred of logical thought. It had been terrifying the first time, this _just feeling_ business. Now, it was sanctimony. It was an offering.

Anyone who did not think sex is an act of religion hadn’t had nearly enough of it.

Rocking back and forth like a ship at sea, like a coracle tossed to and fro and it was _scary_ but it was _exhilarating_ and drowning in another person had never felt so much like worship.

Erwin says his name, _“Levi-,_ and it was a prayer, he dragged Erwin down for a kiss and it was a votive.

This-this tiny apartment with its squeaky mattress, and the scent of tea everywhere and sheets so soft as to be divine-was their _holiest of holies._

But, no ship could sail forever. No boat could float for eternity. All crafts must break over rocks eventually.

An easy thing, and easy request, tilting Levi’s head back and listening to moans and sighs and ragged gasps tossed back and forth like waves slapping against a rock. Pleasure was a storm in Levi’s brain, but all the fight went out long ago.

_So beautiful,_ Erwin whispered, and Levi shivered.

_He on me makes_ we.

A wave rolled.

_I’m so horribly afraid, Erwin-_

Built, and builds, and everything is liquid heat…

_That I am terribly in love with you._

Crashed, destroyed, _created._ Shuddering and clawing Levi’s nails down that cliff-face back, there was no stopping it. Just to _feel,_ and _feel,_ and _more._

After every storm came a period of silence.

Sweat dripping like water off rocks.

Whispered laughter like a breeze.

Kisses like balm in hot air.

“I love you,” Erwin whispered, and Levi felt his whole body glow, entire self vaster than any ocean.

Erwin’s fingers ran through his feathery hair, slow and languid with gentle exhaustion. Levi felt it pull heavily at his own bones, mouth opening to tell Erwin that they were still sticky, that they needed to clean up, that they would survive a few moments in the cold.

But Erwin’s arms were curling around him, and his golden head was resting on Levi’s shoulder, and the afterglow of his orgasm was wearing away but the _ache_ in Levi’s chest wasn’t. It was still beating warm, and soft, and stubborn, and with a quiet hum of defeat Levi let it carry him away. A press of lips to Erwin’s temple and the softest of yawns, and the prose of the room blurred into the poetry of sleep.

-=-=-=-=-


End file.
